The Turning Point

The next week turned out to be a crucial turning point in the process of Depression (or so I've been told by a couple of people). The work week began and everything was still weighing on me. Financial matters have bothered me in the past, but it has never lasted close to this long. I felt like I needed to talk to someone or let someone else know how I was feeling.

I forget what day it was early that week (probably Monday), but I wrote an e-mail to Traci from work. I let her know in general how I was feeling and that I had written something to help get my feelings out and where I had put it when I got home from work the day I wrote it. She read it (and the lyrics) and seemed pretty shocked and concerned. We exchanged several e-mails that day talking about it and my feelings.

On Wednesday of that week (July 22), I posted the following status on Facebook: "Scott Steinman would appreciate your prayers." I figured I would get some comments on this, but didn't expect so quickly and as many as I got. It felt good to have people praying for me. However, Traci also got some questions and calls about what was going on, which she didn't want to deal with. So I changed my status at her request. I had no problems with that. I didn't want her to have to deal with anything like that (or feel like she had to deal with that); it wasn't fair to her.

We (Traci and I) went on to exchange a number of e-mails that week. Over the course of that week, I did some research on if there were any benefits available for mental health as a part of my benefit package through work. I was glad to see that benefits were available. (All I needed was another major expense to add into our already-tight budget!)

Traci and I talked about the possibility of me starting to see a counselor so I called the benefit provider and asked for a referral list of providers near home. (This was part of the referral process for using these benefits. I then needed to let them know who I planned to start seeing and then they would get in touch with them to communicate what needed to be communicated about my benefits for the services.) After looking over the list and doing some research on each of the counselors that looked like possibilities (over the course of a day or two), I decided to start seeing Victoria Hanley, LMFT. She's in La Habra so it's a short drive, maybe 10 minutes, but far enough away that it doesn't feel like I'm going next door. I scheduled my first appointment for that Friday, July 24.